- In 2003 he switched from briefs to boxers. Three months later, he switched back.
- His favorite flavor is plain.
- He drives a silver 2003 Honda Accord. Beige was unavailable.
- He rarely initiates a conversation about anything, but when he does it’s usually about the weather.
- He drinks decaf with a little cream and no sugar.
- His apartment is entirely void of hot sauce.
- If you go to dinner with him, chances are good that he’ll order the same thing as you.
- He calls his mom at least once a week. She almost always ends the conversation.
“I don’t often drink beer, but when I do… oh, I guess I usually get Bud Light… or maybe… Miller Lite. I had Corona once; that was pretty good. Blah blah blah…”