Why do you hate fat people?

17 05 2011

I talk about being fat like it’s a bad thing (as if it weren’t) and this is what people ask me.  I don’t hate them, but I don’t generally like them because I don’t like to look at them.  Obesity seems to generate a response in my head similar to that of seeing someone who is deformed, or if they’re super obese – to gore.  To some extent, I hold it against them, as I’ve believed for most of my life that people who are fat are responsible for their own state.  I actually know better, but I still want to blame them.  Their appearance offends me and I want it to be their fault.  I want it to be a character flaw, but I know it’s not.  They are not fat because they are lazy.  They are not fat because they are gluttons.  They are fat because they’ve been eating the Standard American diet long enough for their long enough that they’ve overwhelmed their metabolic system, and if they’re overeating, it’s because their bodies are making them do so.

For the majority of my life, I’ve been one of those people who can eat anything and not accumulate any body fat.  I was in the Army several years ago, went to Basic Training at age 18.  While some of my platoon-mates lost 30 or 40 pounds in the eight weeks we were there, I gained 17 and still showed no sign of body fat.  I ate voraciously in that time because I was extremely scared that I might lose weight, which I could not afford to do.  When I went in, I weighed 148 pounds at 5’11” and was fairly muscular, at least above the waist.  After Basic when my activity level had slowed down, I learned that I couldn’t eat as much any more.  I’m not saying I learned that I couldn’t get away with eating just as much, but that I literally couldn’t eat the same amount of food as I had been accustomed to.  I remained lean for years.

Since the beginning of puberty, I would complain about constantly being hungry and having difficulty in maintaining or gaining weight.  I felt better when I weighed more, but if I gained five pounds in a week, I’d lose the next week.  Somewhere around age 23, I began to lose this problem.  I was out of the Army and working security when I discovered a way out of constant hunger.  I would stock up on frozen dinners and eat about 3 pounds worth in one 12-hour shift.  For the first time ever, I had an ass.  My wife was quite pleased about this.  I wasn’t entirely happy about how I’d done it or the shape of my body, but it stopped the painful persistent hunger and that made it worth it.  You know, people aren’t all that sympathetic when someone complains about how hard it is being fat, but try complaining about being too skinny and you’ll only get unmasked hostility (assuming you’re actually skinny).

For years I maintained a nearly athletic figure with a BMI in the “normal weight” range, while eating crap food and exercising very little.  I knew about the Atkins diet, but I didn’t know a lot about it.  It sounded kind of too good to be true.  I read a little about the paleo diet, and that seemed to make a lot of sense to me, but I didn’t invest much time into reading about.  There also seemed to be some contraversy about what Paleolithic man actually ate.  I wasn’t overweight, so this stuff wasn’t that important to me.  Then one day,  I was.  I swear to God I went to Chipotle and got one of their delicious burritos.  I ate the whole thing and became bloated, which was normal.  Which wasn’t normal was that the bloat didn’t seem to go away.

Some time back, I watched a lecture by science writer, Gary Taubes.  Gary was asking some very good questions about the common beliefs of human nutrition.  He had found what people around here like to call a shit-ton of evidence suggesting that ideas such as the big one that obesity is caused by gluttony, sloth, or some evil combination of the two, might be very wrong.  He also suggested that maybe Atkins was right, pointing to scientific research indicating that he was.  I was sold, and further reading on dietary intake of saturated fat and cholesterol convinced me that Atkins was right.  More reading convinced me that a diet devoid of grains, low in carbs, and high in saturated animal fat is not only good for losing weight but can also prevent and often cure almost every disease humans face.  This should make sense if you understand the concept of the paleo diet.  The diet that modern humans have adapted to eating is the one which our bodies work best on.  This means that health problems of modern humans are caused by us eating foods that are not natural for us.  Obesity is just one of those many problems.  If you first become overweight at age 15 and learn what to do about it, you might just live a longer healthier life than someone who waits until they’re 40 to become overweight.

When I started getting a fat belly, I cut back on sugar, and it seemed to do the trick somewhat, but I really wish I had known this stuff years ago.

If you’ve never looked into the low-carb or paleo diet, and need a quick explanation of why it would work or how carbs make us fat, go read Dr. Michael Eades review on Taubes’s new book, Why We Get Fat and What to Do About It.

If that sounds interesting, get Taubes’s book.

If you want to know more about Taubes research into everyone else’s research, or you need endless citations and a response to every challenge he could ever anticipate, get his other older book, Good Calories Bad Calories.  It’s an amazing book, but it’s very long and very detailed.  The newer book is much more concise and to the point.

If you don’t want to pay for either book, the video lecture that I watched way back when is on Google Videos for free.  It’s 71 minutes long and has some pictures of naked fat people.  You have been warned.

If you have a really hard time accepting the notion that doctors and researchers could be so wrong about nutrition for so many decades, please watch this presentation, by marginal comedian, blogger, and creator of the Fathead documentary, Tom Naughton.  It’s 42 minutes or so, and is full of lame jokes in front of a very receptive audience.  You have been warned again.

If you don’t care for that, and just want to hear someone funny, go watch some Lewis C.K. videos.

I don’t hate fat people.  I hate the fact that so many people are fat, especially the women.  I found this very depressing.  It’s even worse when it happens to girls I know.  I don’t really hate fat people.






Dear Cycleboy

6 08 2010

An apparent Brit commented recently comment on my old post, We’re Different. I went back and read that and the two follow-ups, and I’m not so sure I managed to get my point across. Perhaps I should try again.

The problem with the “sexes are different” is that you cannot prove it one way or another.

I’m not so much interested in proving to the satisfaction of the scientific community. I’m interested in sharing the conclusions I’ve arrived at that help me deal with others, especially women. My main intent with that post was to point out what I see as a primary source of frustration between men and women – the unproven assumption that we are the same.

I lived for many years in Indonesia and saw things and behaviour that was considered completely ‘natural’ there, but which seemed odd to my European eyes.

You say this without giving a single example. I’m highly doubtful that anything you saw would contradict my way of thinking.

What part of our gender (as opposed to the obvious ‘sex’ differences) is culturally defined and what is biologically determined?

It’s not as simple as one or the other, as nurture versus nature. A person’s experience can determine which genetic behavioral traits are expressed, which are not, and which are perverted. Also, there are some differences between different groups of humans. Different environments result in different adaptations.

Armed with the experience in another culture, I reserve the right to be sceptical about those who point to commonly seen behaviours and claim them to be biologically determined. Where’s the proof? Where’s the control group?

Why is this important to you? It is ridiculous to demand that everything must be proven by scientists in laboratory conditions before one may believe it.

I’ve seen, heard and read enough examples of differences to conclude that much of what we regard as ‘normal’ are only normal in our time and culture.

I’m not concerned with what’s normal.

After all, there have even been studies to see if girls are more attracted to pink than boys. Yet, only 100 years ago pink was a boy’s colour. The idea that you might dress a girl in pink was considered as outrageous as dressing a boy in pink would be today (at least in ‘western’ cultures).

Yes, I’ve heard that. It’s amusing but of no consequence. Neither pink nor baby blue seem very masculine to me.





Beautiful Women

8 03 2010

Recently, I saw the most beautiful woman I know in real life. She is perfectly proportioned, with a back that’s always a bit more arched than it probably should be. Her ass is wonderful and her perky medium-sized breasts are great, but it’s the way that it all flows together that really does it for me. Her hair is long and dark brown. Her eyes are wide and deep brown. She is probably partly Latin, Greek, or Persian. Her nose is perfect, not unlike Evangeline Lilly‘s. She’s about 5’2″ or 3″, which is ideal to me. Whatever her body fat percentage is, it’s what everyone else’s should be. One might describe her as thin, but she doesn’t appear to need a sandwich (like a runway model). If I had a type, it would be her. Her manner is delicate and feminine, and interactions with her are always pleasant. Every word that describes feminine beauty fits her. She is pretty, hot, sexy, cute, gorgeous, and, of course, beautiful. When she is present, I find her appearance distracting. She catches my eye whenever she’s visible. I cannot think of any famous woman who is more attractive. I have heard that she has an ugly side, but as long as I don’t get to know her any better than I do, I’ll probably never see it.

I did ask her out once. She said her boyfriend wouldn’t like that. That’s probably for the best. For now I can simply admire her beauty as something I like about the world.  I can’t see how she or anyone else could actually live up to the image I have of her.

Because they can get away with it, very attractive women are very often horrible people. They often fail to mature socially the way most women and almost all men have to. I think this failure to mature can even help explain the phenomenon of hot chicks with douchebags, as more socially evolved women flat-out roll their eyes at the excesses of douchebaggery. There definitely are exceptions, but I think it’s a good rule of thumb (for me, at least) to ignore those who are (or carry themselves as if the were) the most physically attractive. When Adam Carolla was on Loveline, any time a girl would speak as if her words were more valuable than his own and Dr. Drew’s, he would accuse her of being hot. I think he was right, and they never said he was wrong. Hot girls are used to people paying attention to them and are accustomed to others paying attention to what they say, regardless of its importance. This is not simply an issue of men consciously trying to sleep with them; it’s that people who are aesthetically pleasing to others subconsciously garner more sympathy/empathy, and an adorable little girl can get away with anything. I remember how when my younger sister was very young, both of my parents had difficulty in scolding her because her cute smile would have them both gushing. Ugly children might not have it so easy, but at least they learn that bad behavior has negative consequences.

While I really want women to understand how important their own physical beauty is when it comes to being attractive to men, I also don’t want them to think perfection is necessary or even desirable. The most recent woman I fell for is quite attractive, but she has some significant imperfections. As I got to know her, these became insignificant. Actually, they pretty much vanished. Occasionally, I still run into her, and I still see that person I got to know. I see more than just what shows.  As I get to know people, they tend to look either better or worse. I think this can even get to the point that it doesn’t matter at all what someone looks like (like maybe after a few decades of a good happy marriage). I suspect this happens with everyone, but people don’t talk about it much.





Fucking Italians

13 12 2009

There’s some new reality show on MTV called “Jersey Shore”, where they follow around a bunch of young spoiled “guidos” and “guidettes” who like to party or something. I don’t know. I haven’t seen and probably never will. Anyway, the show is getting heat from Italian-American organizations for promoting the negative stereotypes of Italians. Hell, the show is probably creating all new stereotypes in the minds of viewers, but ya know… IT’S NOT FICTION! Nobody wrote this shit! these are actual douchebags and sluts who probably didn’t behave much differently before assholes with cameras started following them around. Is MTV supposed to cancel the show to prevent white America from learning more a small group of slightly less white* American brats?

guido hits guidette

The girl is part of the show and MTV used this clip in a Promo for the show. That’s what really got the crybabies all angry. But, once again, it happened for real. The guy was arrested, is facing charges, and was suspended from his job, as a NYC alternative school gym teacher. HA!

From this article in the New York Post:

It’s a low-rent version of “The Sopranos,” said André DiMino, president of the Italian-America service organization, UNICO.

” ‘The Sopranos’ are at one end of the spectrum, the Mafioso, and then this is the other — bimbos and buffoons. This is how we’re being portrayed,” he said yesterday.

“It’s worse than I could have ever imagined, the lowest form of stereotyping you can ever see.”

I thought these people were stupid when they were crying about The Sopranos, as the show was modeled after the actual existing Italian American crime families that operate on the East coast. How realistic it was is hard for me to know, but now they’re crying about a show that depicts reality, and I want them to die of cancer. The word “portrayal” implies some separation from reality, like a work of fiction. Don’t fall for this idiocy; realize that they’re trying to censor real life.

Some stereotypes are true.

Actually, most of them are.

Black people like fried chicken.

White people like mayonnaise.

Indians (from India) smell.

Irish people are drunks.

Indians (from America) are worse drunks.

Asians are smart.

Jews are thrifty.

Gypsies steal shit.

Russians are morose and age rapidly. They tend to drink, but I think this is more a byproduct of their dark mood than genetic predisposition to addiction like with the above mentioned drunks.

* – For some folks, “white” refers specifically to Anglos, and Italians are sometimes seen as a minority, especially by those oh-so-many Italian-American organizations.

see also: http://www.philly.com/philly/entertainment/78584622.html?cmpid=15585797